Time and money

It’s very easy to spend money on the small things and before you know it, at the end of the month you don’t have enough money to go to the movies. You may buy a coke for a little over a $1, a candy for another dollar. Lottery ticket, quick lunch, cup of coffee or breakfast sandwich or any other small items you can easily get very cheap will add up at the end of the day, week, or month. You may have to sacrifice some little things so you can enjoy your time with the people you love. You may have to save money to plan a dinner, movie, mini golf, carnival or any other activity.
The same goes with time together. Set aside time every week to have fun and spend time together. Plan some activities so everyone can look forward to that week. If you have kids explain to them how important it is to do their homework and chores so you can spend more time with them, or help them with their homework so they can enjoy you helping them and look forward to their activity. If it’s only two of you write down 3 activities on a piece of paper, if it’s a family let everyone write down an activity on a piece of paper and let someone draw and go for it. You will have a special relationship with the people you love if you bond with them.

Success of a first date

We’ve all gone out on a date nervous and scared because it’s our first date together. We want to make a good first impression hoping everything is perfect. The start of a successful date is really feeling good about yourself. That alone will transmit to others. The better you know yourself, the more successful you will be. Saying that, does not mean talking about yourself or being selfish on your date. It is important to know who you are and feel good about yourself. Be proud. If you are not sure, then ask yourself, “What kind of person am I?” Write a page of things you like or positive things about yourself and reread it several times, making changes along the way. You will begin to feel more confident about yourself.

Women, Keep in mind:

Men don’t always want to initiate sex. He may enjoy being approached by you first. He may feel sexy and attractive.

Getting angry or blaming him if things don’t go your way can hurt your relationship. So never be judgemental. Sometimes he may want patience and kindness.

Let him know what you want. He can’t read your mind and he would like you to enjoy intimacy.

Even though men won’t admit it, they also have an emotional side. Set a romantic mood for him. Surprise him with something you both would enjoy.

Keep your problems to Yourselves

I married you, not your family. Every member of your family is going to be part of your lives some way or another. If you think talking to your in-laws is going to help you get closer to them, think again. Don’t do it! Don’t bring it up, don’t ask for advice. You are asking to break in trust between you and your spouse. It’s very dangerous. Never say any negative things about your spouse, even if you don’t mean any harm. That other person will remember the problem you and your spouse had much longer after you and your spouse resolved the issue. They may also look at your marriage differently. They may not know your spouses side and they confront her upset at the situation, which will make matters worse. Just communicate and work it out yourselves, if you have to see a therapist but never say anything negative to your other family members, keep it positive.

Intimacy and Marriage

1. Has your sex drive diminished since you’ve been married?
2. If you have any kids, do they interfere with your privacy?
3. Is sex a low priority in your relationship with your spouse?
4. Are you often exhausted when you have sex with your spouse?
5. Do you feel distracted when you are having sex with your spouse?

These are questions that need to be answered to improve your sex lives. Sit down with your spouse and brainstorm together. It’s a type of communication and don’t be shy, it may turn out to be a lot of fun. Write down a page of ideas, no matter how bizarre they can be. If sex is a low priority, maybe changing a bit. He or she may be up to it. If you have kids interfering, then come up with a plan. I am positive you will see an improvement in your sex life as well as your marriage life.

cheating on your spouse

If you are cheating on your spouse, you need to end it completely. It needs to be said directly and quickly. You may have a better chance in your marriage than if you were caught. You may think that if you are caught, you may need to be more careful! This will only make it more difficult for both of you. If you want to have a successful relationship with your spouse and family, you must end your affair. Are you having an affair to express frustration in your marriage? Consider why you had the affair. Ask yourself if you are willing to do whatever it takes to repair your marriage? Do you know what went wrong in your marriage? Why did you cheat? Are you willing to give up your affair? These are questions you need to ask yourself. You owe it to yourself and your spouse. Do it for the right reasons, it may be the biggest decision you will ever make.

What is flirting?

You don’t have to be a teenager to be flirting. You can be married and still be flirting with your spouse. Where did flirting come from? The word flirting came from an old french word, ‘fleurter’, which means flower. Flirting is about making someone smile and happy by giving them a compliment. Its about getting to know the person and having fun. It doesn’t matter how old you are. I once went by a retirement home and saw a 90 year old man making a 82 year old lady laugh and giggle. Flirting is a way of showing them you are interested in them. It’s harmless and beautiful that when we leave it, we crave it, leaving us wanting more. Flirting is making ourselves attractive so he or she can make contact with you. Its feeling good about yourself. It doesn’t always have to do with the opposite sex. It can also be useful in social or work situations. It can bring deeper friendships. Flirting is not prejudice. It’s so much about so many things that it’s hard to say what flirting is. One thing for sure, it’s the key to more romance, great friendships and a powerful sensation for yourself and people around you. The flower, ‘fleurter’, turns out to be a beautiful thing.

Don’t take your relationship for granted

Most relationships are treated as any ordinary thing in their lives. Many go through each day without letting each other know how they feel about each other. Don’t throw away your relationship by putting it in with all your daily obligations. You want it to be more than that. Take care of your partner, pay attention, take action to their needs and you’ll be surprised in what you get in return. Put your relationship ahead of all other things and don’t take it for granted. Keep it fresh and exciting and it will become more special.

The ideal free date

Times are tough and going on a date is sometimes hard to do. You may have to use your imagination. Your date may enjoy a simple evening. There are endless things to do that are fun and cost basically nothing, depending on where you live or what you do. If you work at the stadium, you can pack a picnic dinner and have some music. If you live near the mountains, then drive up to a beautiful special place and watch the sunset. The best part of going on a date, even if it’s with your spouse, is getting to know each other more. Spreading a blanket, eating lunch under a tree, telling jokes, playing a card game watching the sunset, smiling and joking is a perfect way to spend time, and getting to know each other. Use your imagination, dance in the back yard, go walking inside the mall, or go to the playground in the park. Precious moments is spending time with each other, just remember that some best things in life don’t come with a price tag.

10 commandments of communication

1. Thou shall figure out what you want to say before you say it. Before you have a serious conversation with your spouse, make sure you know what you want to say to avoid misunderstandings.

2. You shall decide what your needs are from your spouse. Whether you need an answer or just appreciation, you are more likely to get it if you know what you want.

3. Thou shall use good timing. You must judge the timing when you want to talk to your spouse. Is he or she sick, he or she late for kids soccer game, or is preparing for a big meeting at work.

4. Thou shall make eye contact. You are more likely to listen to each other if you are looking at each other.

5. Thou shall get each others’ undivided attention. If you are trying to talk to each other and have something else in your mind, you will not be heard.

6. You shall be a good listener. You were giving 2 ears and one mouth to do twice as much listening as talking. Your discussion will be more productive.

7. Thou shall confirm #6. Make sure your spouse understands what has been said.

8. Thou shall rephrase what has been said. This will onfirm exactly what you’ve heard.

9. You shall schedule a discussion time. This may go with #3 but sometimes you may need your spouse’s full attention when you need it most.

10. Thou shall remember, communication is a 2-way street. Your goal is for both of you to strengthen your relationship and benefit from each other.<img